Dear Sonali Kulkarni, You Need Not Apologize For Showing Mirror To Radical Feminists | Voice For Men India

We live in times, where it is fashionable to speak about fascism, but shut down every single person whose views may differ from theirs. This trend is not just limited to the political spectrum, but also extends against anyone who questions duties of women or their unreasonable demands.

In the past one week, actor Sonali Kulkarni has been in the news for her video clipping describing ‘how some Indian girls have become lazy and they are only looking for well-earning grooms.’ 

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What Did Sonali Say?

Speaking at an event, the actor expressed:

In India a lot of women are just lazy. They want a boyfriend or husband, who earns well, owns a house and gets regular increments. But, in the middle of this, women forget to stand up for themselves. Women don’t know what will they do. I urge everyone to bring up women in your houses who are able and can earn for themselves. Who can say that yes, we want a new fridge in the house, you pay for half of it, I will pay the other half.

Sonali spoke about her friend who didn’t want to marry a man earning below Rs 50K per month or someone who didn’t have a four-wheeler…and someone who would be better if he stayed away from his parents.

She further sided with men and said how they start working at an early age just to take care of the expenses and support their families. Sonali added,

I think when men boys turn 18, they have this pressure on them that the studies and fun are about to get over and now you have to earn. I feel like crying for my brothers and my husband. He got selected from the campus interview when he was all of 20 and he started earning.

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Adding further, Sonali said that contrary to this, women turn 25-27 years of age and pressurise men for international honeymoons, cough up for pre-wedding shoots, etc.

The actor also spoke about intolerance against a mere compliment at work and how women instantly report the same to HR.

Sonali categorically said that she did not mean the same for all women, but this aggression and demands from women are seen to be growing a lot. She added that women also need to look at situations with humbleness and equality by contributing financially in a home.

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Online Bullying

The online bullying by radical feminists continued through the week, where name calling, abusing and passing personal comments on the actor by ‘women rights champions’ sustained.

Expectedly, Sonali had to put out her response, where in a way she was compelled to apologise. Through her post, Sonali wrote:

Dear all, I’m overwhelmed with the feedback I’m receiving. I would like to thank all of you, especially the entire press and media for the extremely mature conduct of connecting with me. Being a woman myself, my intention was not to hurt other women. In fact, I have extensively expressed myself time and again in support of us and what is it being a woman. I’m grateful to all of you for reaching out to me personally to appreciate or to criticize. Hope we will be able to have more open exchange of thoughts.

In my capacity I am trying to think, support and share warmth not only with women, but with the entire mankind. It will be only strengthening if we women with our vulnerabilities and wisdom shine through as fair and able beings. If we are inclusive and empathetic, we will be able to create a healthier, happier place to be.

Having said that, if unknowingly, I may have caused pain, I want to apologize from the bottom of my heart. I do not thrive upon headlines neither do I want to be the center of sensational situations. I’m a diehard optimist and I strongly believe that life indeed is beautiful. Thanks for your patience and support. I have learned a lot from this incident.

However, should Sonali apologise for merely expressing what she sees in real life?

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VFMI Take:

• Why should everything boil down to women’s rights, without speaking about women’s duties?
• Many have argued that women who don’t work are contributing at home; of course this cannot be dismissed by any stretch of imagination
• However, it is also a fact that most women today, particularly the ones who have the luxury of commenting on social media, are equipped with household appliances, which makes life very easy
• Many of the women who push feminism, sexism and misogyny in almost every debate, have a minimum of one, or perhaps an army of maids, cooks, nannies
• Lets look at the not so privileged ones who have no help at home and are managing the chores themselves. Is the life of their husbands at work any easy?
• There are several husbands in India who commute minimum 3-4 hours daily to work, only so their wives and children are not uprooted from their natural surrounding due to job change
• Why has our society reached a stage where only and only comforts, rights and demands of women are supreme, while pressures faced by the men, their ordeal, their daily humiliation at work by arrogant bosses, their sacrifices to give the best to their families, are always passed off as ‘duty’?

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• The argument made by the actor was how women who did not earn, were looking for well-settled men. One needs to visit profiles on matrimonial portals in India, where a woman earning Rs 20K per month expects a groom to be earning Rs 1 lakh per month. There is nothing wrong for a woman to expect a comfortable and secured life from her man, but then, should they be allowed to cry daily about equality?
• Women who have never had passports, suddenly expect annual international holidays from husbands
• In India, dowry is a curse, but endless demands by wives are passed off as eternal duty of the husband 
• Its time for all to ponder on these aspects and reject the blanket statement of equality that is mindlessly pushed by (disgruntled) feminists
• Its time to respect and value the efforts of both men and women and not suppress one gender completely in the name of rights and equality

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Social Media Reactions!

Mainstream media itself is flooded with hardcore feminists who have not published thousands of positive comments in favour of Sonali, who dared to trigger an alternate debate. Here are some of the comments, which are worth sharing for all to read………Hopefully it will be “Chin Up” for Sonali 🙂 

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