Twice Divorced & Third Time Unlucky Kamal Haasan, Shashi Tharoor Want Salaries For Homemakers

Tilottama Tharoor who is half-Bengali, half-Kashmiri was a couple of years older than Shashi Tharoor. She studied at Loreto House and Loreto College, Kolkata, and was known for her debating prowess and ‘Bengali ethnic’ looks. Tharoor and her were both very popular with members of the opposite sex and subsequently started seeing each other. The two married young and had twins.

Tilottama followed her husband as he progressed in his career in the UN. People then quoted that she let him flower, however, the two split after they “grew apart” (as stated by Tharoor) in his 2010 interview.

Shashi Tharoor then married the Deputy secretary of the United Nations Disarmament Commission, Giles, in 2007, after what was believed to be a long affair, which led to many a whisper down the corridors of the UN headquarters in New York.

During the last one year, the then Union Minister in UPA-II had hinted at the tremendous personal sacrifice he had to make by joining politics. Those close to Tharoor also attributed MP’s second time divorce to his “friendship” with Sunanda Pushkar that worsened his strained ties with Giles.

Soon Tharoor married for the third time with Sunanda Pushkar in the year 2010. After spending nearly three years together, Pushkar accused Tharoor of being unfaithful. Sunanda alleged that Tharoor, who met Mehr Tarar, a Lahore-based journalist and single mother to a son, at a social gathering, had remained in touch with on email and Twitter. Mehr was apparently working on a book on Kashmir, which led to her exchanging frequent posts and mails with the minister, whose books she admired and who she hoped would help her meet the right people for her project.

As reported by the Livemint, Sunanda, however, instinctively believed that there was more to this relationship than what met the eye. In June 2013, she accused Tharoor of spending three nights with Tarar in Dubai, where he had gone for a conference. Sunanda Pushkar was found dead under mysterious circumstances in January 2014 at The Leela Hotel in Delhi.

Shashi Tharoor has been charged by the Delhi Police under IPC 498A. 

The background given for the above two gentleman is not to character assassinate them. Surely, it is their personal life and no one can question if they marry once or twice or thrice. However, the problem arises when these Men – who have had three failed relationships and numerous affairs – begin to create a bubble in the minds of simple common families, especially the women homemakers.

What Is Marriage & Who Are Homemakers?

Marriage is not who brings what to the table, but how you contribute to the union as one. For once lets assume, women give up on their professional jobs to take care of household chores, how will you quantify the work done in one’s own home?

I also firmly believe that women must stop using the phrase, “I sacrificed my job for you”.…There are no sacrifices by anyone in 2021! Every move is a calculated one and one chooses to marry and start a family after weighing the pros, cons and what you basically aim for in your life.

How many household in India today do not have maid/s? We are not even touching upon an upper middle class home, where you have one maid for cleaning dusting, one for mopping, one cook, one nanny for the child and others such as drivers, mali bhaiyya (gardeners) etc.

Stop Gender Appeasement For Votes

Both these gentlemen need to come out of their gender appeasement politics and see the ground reality, where several newly wedded brides today, voluntarily choose not to work, because their husbands are doing well, and they wish to travel the world with him. A matrimonial lawyer who I chatted up with recently, told me that today women are not even willing to take up part time jobs to partly support themselves financially, despite having an army of support system at home. They may choose to work for NGOs and be out of the home, but not work in a professional environment under a boss.

If we look at Tier II & III cities, many families today still live in a joint system. How does Mr Haasan & Dr Tharoor plan to cut pay checks to the mother-in-law and 2 daughter-in-laws in the same home where every single expense under the roof would be shared?

I also want to pose this question to women – Do we really want a price tag on ourselves for taking care of our paradise, giving birth to children, supporting husbands for bringing food to the table or giving us a blessed lifestyle in general? If one honestly feels deprived of a salary, find a way out. Get yourself professionally employed and hire a caretaker to take care of the home.

What about Men?

Men in India are born to be ‘providers’. Who pays them for taking care of their families? For a man, family includes, his parents, possibly grandparents too, his wife, his children, unmarried/widowed sisters too. Besides this, a husband has to strike a balance to keep his parents and wife happy – a price he has to pay silently for being a man.

If a wife is not working or supporting in the home financially, every single expenditure is borne by the husband, from the daily needs to holidays to cars, entertainment, education for children, expensive gifts & jewelry for wife, her personal expenses, medical expenses and much much more.

Have we realised that though a man would be working, he never spends his own salary on him! By the time he ends up making his family happy with materialist needs, he is virtually left with nothing, because once again, he has to ‘save’ for the future of his family.

Have the two wise gentleman also analysed the joint savings account held by a couple or a joint property or wife’s equal share in her matrimonial home? A woman today may choose to sit idle, but has every single right to her advantage, not just during marriage, but also if it fails.

What are Men left with? Will they get any share in wife’s property if they divorce? Instead, irrespective whether wife is working or not, husband will have to pay her ‘maintenance’ or one time alimony.

Mr Haasan & Dr Tharoor,